return my video game
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
