im so drunk with asians
where?
always
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
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