And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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