I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
