Please, let me fuck your mom
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
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