Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
