I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Randomize