Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
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