I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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