He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Dick very happy bro
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