I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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