the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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