Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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