anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
