The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
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