Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
