GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
