I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
