He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
