you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
