my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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