Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
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