So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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