So drunk its hurt
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
don't judge my taste in strippers
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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