Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize