Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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