I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
