At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
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I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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