my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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