He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize
