Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
