Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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