yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
