so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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