so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Randomize
