I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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