so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
