i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
