so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
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