That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
