yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
