just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize