We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
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Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
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I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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