Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Randomize
