Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
