Texts From Last Night

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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  So you're taking me there this weekend?

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.

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  (508): Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu (781): So you're taking me there this weekend? (508): oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food. http://tfl.nu/y6ju
  Replies (35) Good night (7721) Bad night (1207)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that

  (850): View more from Florida

  im pretty sure thats an 11

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  (941): i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that (850): im pretty sure thats an 11 http://tfl.nu/g2lw
  Replies (23) Good night (4315) Bad night (1317)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.

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  (770): She is just riding on my slutty coat tails. http://tfl.nu/ci3j
  Replies (6) Good night (2378) Bad night (1003)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.

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  (301): just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month. http://tfl.nu/ntmv
  Replies (13) Good night (3525) Bad night (957)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.

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  (614): And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts. http://tfl.nu/c0eu
  Replies (5) Good night (1133) Bad night (2523)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am

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  (408): who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am http://tfl.nu/787a
  Replies (13) Good night (2668) Bad night (988)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.

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  (201): I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed. http://tfl.nu/jlau
  Replies (3) Good night (715) Bad night (1889)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  It was a book called Gay Safari.

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.

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  (410): It was a book called Gay Safari. (443): I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel. http://tfl.nu/jo6k
  Replies (2) Good night (643) Bad night (382)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"

  (682): View more from Texas

  God please dont post that to facebook.

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  (817): you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe" (682): God please dont post that to facebook. http://tfl.nu/pwe8
  Replies (3) Good night (499) Bad night (551)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.

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  (856): I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing. http://tfl.nu/phds
  Replies (1) Good night (828) Bad night (366)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.

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  (805): I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them. http://tfl.nu/ui2l
  Replies (0) Good night (632) Bad night (300)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field

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  (973): Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field http://tfl.nu/t5vl
  Replies (0) Good night (532) Bad night (268)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now

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  (814): Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now http://tfl.nu/h43x
  Replies (0) Good night (636) Bad night (269)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night

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  (973): you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night http://tfl.nu/cnct
  Replies (0) Good night (476) Bad night (377)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk

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  (304): I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk http://tfl.nu/ufvz
  Replies (0) Good night (365) Bad night (262)

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