Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.

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(917): K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs. http://tfl.nu/lbd0

Replies (11) Good night (601) Bad night (1480)
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(303): View more from Colorado

Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England

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(303): Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England http://tfl.nu/wgnu

Replies (63) Good night (16840) Bad night (1102)
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(256): View more from Alabama

She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.

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(256): She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating. http://tfl.nu/eva0

Replies (58) Good night (4546) Bad night (2113)
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(813): View more from Florida

Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?

(203): View more from Connecticut

everyone's regretting their thursdays.

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(813): Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird? (203): everyone's regretting their thursdays. http://tfl.nu/3lei

Replies (7) Good night (4214) Bad night (901)
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(416): View more from Toronto

Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.

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(416): Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing. http://tfl.nu/2fe4

Replies (18) Good night (2350) Bad night (2782)
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(408): View more from California

By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.

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(408): By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going. http://tfl.nu/xmei

Replies (6) Good night (893) Bad night (1758)
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(714): View more from California

He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.

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(714): He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up. http://tfl.nu/ay8q

Replies (11) Good night (2531) Bad night (627)
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(812): View more from Indiana

Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?

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(812): Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver? http://tfl.nu/nssb

Replies (5) Good night (1588) Bad night (499)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.

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(203): No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience. http://tfl.nu/6ty7

Replies (11) Good night (1546) Bad night (826)
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(520): View more from Arizona

I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.

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(520): I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special. http://tfl.nu/erlc

Replies (8) Good night (3516) Bad night (502)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang

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(610): Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang http://tfl.nu/jrxr

Replies (2) Good night (1014) Bad night (463)
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(862): View more from New Jersey

You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"

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(862): You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe" http://tfl.nu/u8zn

Replies (3) Good night (1038) Bad night (599)
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(901): View more from Tennessee

I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.

(901): View more from Tennessee

But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.

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(901): I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes. (901): But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes. http://tfl.nu/ipaj

Replies (4) Good night (947) Bad night (293)
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(256): View more from Alabama

You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.

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(256): You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No. http://tfl.nu/binp

Replies (11) Good night (677) Bad night (312)
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(613): View more from Ontario

Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?

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(613): Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates? http://tfl.nu/iv63

Replies (3) Good night (542) Bad night (354)

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