I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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