So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
