No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
