I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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